The Happy One? You were never sad, Mourinho!

250 journalists obediently crammed into a room. There were 40 TV crews present in the building. These are numbers that confirmed that Jose Mourinho is box-office. Monday was his official unveiling, after he completed his second coming to Stamford Bridge and it was a fantastic opportunity for pressman to eat from his table.

Fashionably late for the occasion, the former Real Madrid arrived to a million camera flashes and desperate yelps from cameramen. He took his time to pose for pictures, revelling in the affection the English media has for him.

And then, it was time to milk the soundbites.

The first question flew out. "Are you still the Special One?"

"I am the Happy One," he said. It was almost instant. And that statement alone has become headlines for all the major sports websites and blogs I read.

This, is why we - this writer included - absolutely love the Portuguese showman. Articulate, blunt, engaging and armed with charisma.

However, as intriguing as that statement is, I find it hard to wrap my head around it. Was there ever a time when Mourinho was sad? I think not. From FC Porto to Inter Milan to Real Madrid, it has always been about him. He always sought absolute control, influenced every decision and before you knew it, he was on a flight to another country.

Like he admitted at the unveiling, he was never one to stay long. It was all an adventure playing with rich owners' cheque books, to fund his insatiable appetite for trophies.

He said: "My adventure around Europe was fantastic for me. I think, for this moment, with my 50th birthday, I am still very young. It is the beginning of a new period."

In the last three years, it has not gone his way and the 50-year-old has aged badly and been brought down to earth.

"When I was managing for the first time. I thought I knew everything. After managing for 13 years, your realise you know nothing," he quipped.

The Manchester clubs snubbed him. Pep Guardiola snubbed Abramovich. There was no other option than a reunion between Abramovich and Mourinho, who he denied falling apart with.

"I am returning to a house where I was happy and successful. The expectations are higher because people know what I can deliver. I know this club has a special fan base, a special club.

"I need a special family and this club gives me this."

That word 'special' again. Yes, I agree you are special, Jose. But it is time to weave your magic, like only, absolutely can. Sugar-coated words will not be your salvation this time around.

Mourinho’s second coming, Jesus is on his way and Neymar arrives

The circus is back in England. Jose Mourinho has sealed his return as Chelsea boss and in depressingly familiar fashion, resumed with feeding the media with soundbites, we frankly now take with a pinch of salt.

“I’m not happy – I am very happy,” he said. “When you return to a place it is for some reason, not just because you have good results in the past or because the fans like you very much, it’s also because as a human point of view you left something here.”

I don’t think so, Jose. Like someone said, this is a marriage of convenience. No one wants the hot seat at Stamford Bridge and there are no big clubs circling around the Portuguese.

Some Chelsea fans are very estatic already and the odds have been slashed on the Blues winning the League and maybe the Champions League. It won’t be that smooth. Arsene Wenger is planning to overhaul his squad this summer and mount a serious challenge next campaign. David Moyes is ready to settle in straightaway and continue Sir Alex Ferguson’s legacy, while Manuel Pellegrini has been given a mandate to win five trophies in five years.

One of the players who will be part of that project is Jesus Navas. The Spanish winger is no doubt a very talented wide player, but like I always say, the English League is unforgiving. Last season, in 37 games, the Sevilla man failed to find the back of the net. In that same position from the right, Arsenal’s Theo Walcott scored 21 times.

More confusing is why City agreed to pay up to £22.9million for the 27-year-old. Navas, who suffered from a case of chronic homesickness, was not comfortable going anywhere beyond the Andalusian city and has not played outside La Liga. We will see how this pans out.

Finally, Neymar has landed in Europe and it’s official. The Brazilian superstar was unveiled on Monday at the Camp Nou and promised to “help Lionel Messi remain the best player on the planet”. It surely will be a big ask. Neymar is used to being the main man. The one who dictates the speed and direction of play. Now he will only be a part of a glittering support cast behind Messi.

One wonders if he will automatically walk into the first 11, or will be constantly rotated with Alexis Sanchez, Pedro Rodriguez and Cesc Fabregas. I’m not too sure if he should have joined Real Madrid, but I know his new challenge in Spain, will not be a walk in the park.

Uti's eviction: My point of view

Uti is out. Not by any high level boardroom politics or meanderings. The jury was out on him and Africans that voted dutifully ensured he was the third to walk out of the BBA 3 doors. He might send out that usual vibes of breathing the air of freedom but truth be told, he could have easily banked the $100,000 the winner stands to get. That wasn’t to be all thanks to his dramatic persona and misgivings. Uti was already a lamb ready to be slaughtered and after Lucille’s eviction when he went paranoid, the housemates and ultimately the viewers agreed they had taken enough. Irrespective of the fact that he was already a reality show veteran, he didn’t play the right aces when it mattered. As a result, all the high expectations and promises fizzled out last Sunday. It was close though. A clear indication that some people were sentimental about him and appreciated his antics. But from the nominations, it was almost evident he didn’t stand a chance against Munya or the effervescent Ricco. All in all, Uti Nwachukwu is another instant celebrity like his predecessors and he is bound to grab all the limelight back home in Nigeria.

And he died!

Death is usually a sad occurence but painful when it could have clearly been avoided.I just lost a friend this morning who died as a result of what I suspect to be suicide.And what did my friend die for? A lover! My friend was dating this particular girl and spending freely on her.From what I gathered,the girl clearly didnt fancy my friend and just tagged along as she had immense financial benefits.When she felt she had enough,she will call it off and send my friend into emotional shambles.My friend will drink to a stupor and misbehave to people around.Lately,my friend began the frightening attitude of wanting to commit suicide by slicing his skin with knife.And now, my friend is no more two hours after we met and gisted. Rest in peace Idrisha! We will miss you!

To my Anonymous posters..

You guys have been wonderful really.At least your little efforts ensure that I am encouraged to check up on my blog.But it would also be nice if you included your name.Or if you dont want me to publish your names,feel free to let me know.Well,I have been in Lagos for almost a month and I have been having a blast! Been here and there and done that and I dread to think of going back.I almost feel like crying.Well,for those still living in the stone ages,the Apprentice Africa (ww.theapprenticeafrica.com) is on TV now.Its makes riveting viewing I must add too.Well,till I get round to blogging again(no matter how convoluted),take care!

Will soon be back..!

Exams don almost quench me oh!..lol.. Been writing exams for the past three weeks.Can you just imagine that? Okay,I will not exaggerate much cos most of the papers in between were shifted due to some internal brouhaha but thankfully,we should finish by Monday or so.I simply cant wait to be in Lagos!..I need that ambience,I have missed the people and the grooves.I know Chude sneaks into my blog once in a while so let me use this medium to tell him that he is among the group I have missed.I missed him,his friends,all the "waka" and even The Future Awards and I cant wait to be back.So friends and family,next week is the deal!

It's my birthday today!!!

Today is my birthday.It feels really good to have added a year days after the new year celebrations.Fortunately or unfortunately,I dont get to celebrate with friends cos we are always on holidays.All the same,I give thanks to God for sparing my life to see today.Needless to say,many have gone but I usually have a strong belief.Ansd it is that people that are alive are people that have a purpose to fulfill on earth.Friends,family,well-wishers and fellow bloggers,join me in expressing gratitude to God for infinite mercies.